My head hurts. Whose idea was it to go to a wedding yesterday?

It's a wonder at times that he doesn't dump me:

Rob: You know that plastic funnel, the one that's been by the phone since I moved in?
Me: Never seen it before in my life.
Rob: It's been here for at least eight months. You little liar.

Five days before having to fit into quite a fitted dress, the last thing one should do is to go to an all-you-can eat Chinese buffet. I now have a stomach like a 6-month pregnant woman. What's worse is that I get the most vivid dreams after eating Chinese (probably a result of the salt and the MSG) and I know also have bags under my eyes that are large enough to carry a family of four's weekly shop.

In other news, it has been a bit damp here, but the potatoes should be thriving on it. Today, however, sees clear blue skies and sun... I wonder how long that will last?!

After hearing excited tales about planting cabbages in collars (which conjures up some interesting images, but is far more mundane than it could be!) I headed off to the garden during my free(ish) lesson this afternoon. Suddenly the garden has been transformed from empty soil to heaving beds in a matter of weeks. Everything seems to be looking ok, apart from one or two broad beans (slugged), one garlic (stunted and probably dead) and the blackcurrants, which have some leaves that are sporting a slightly worrying raised brown patch. I don't think it's Big Bud, but I've not been able to find pictures to be sure, so any blackcurrant experts out there, please help!

In addition to planting more veg than you can shake the proverbial stick at*, Rob and I built a proper fruit cage over the blackcurrants and the gooseberry bush. Girly-guidey square lashing seems to have come in useful, for once! The only problem with all this gardening is that I want to harvest the stuff NOW. NOW, I tell you. Harrumph.

* This sentence is a contender for the Crap Subclause Award 2006.

We were woken up by a bird cheeping loudly in the bedroom at 5.30am. Your Cat was to blame. We rescued it, and then collapsed back under the duvet. By 8.00am she'd caught it again. Or if not that bird then another very similar. Damn brute.

I've managed to break the internet and now (thankfully) I've fixed some of it, but there are still big chunks that I can't access. Like my email. Pah. I suspect there's another 45 minute phonecall to customer services ahead of me. Waaah.

It must be summer: Test Match Special is back! Hurrah for crickety goodness.

Last night was the annual CCF mess dinner. Like every other mess dinner that I've been to, the wine was flowing. However, the port got stuck at the other end of the table, so I did a commando roll across the floor (so I wouldn't get noticed by the RSM) to liberate another bottle. I've now got another drinking injury to add to my collection: carpet burn.

For those scientists out there, the evening can be summed up thus:

slight "dead badger" taste + wobbly head + drinking injury = top night out

Teaching this morning will be fun, though!

I got to go on a Gold D of E practice expedition this weekend. Yomping over Bleaklow and Kinder Scout was good fun, but I could now sleep for a year, if not more. Tomorrow is the deadline for internal 6th form reports, and I have rather a lot to write. Today could be a long day. Pah.

I'm sitting outside, on the small strip of grass that separates my flat from the carpark, enjoying a) the first day of REAL summer weather; and b) the delights of outdoor wireless geekery. The cats have managed to haul their fat bums outside and are now collapsed in the sunlight as a result of their exhaustion. This afternoon's excitement is "The Most Meanignful Of Sports: Rounders" (as it is officially known around these parts) which is a good thing, as today's weather is ideal for getting out first ball and then lazing in the sun in support of your team-mates. The only downside is the need to go watering things in the garden later on. Tough life, eh?!

For the first time in a couple of days I've broken free from the pile of marking and have a moment to myself to blog. Well, I say to myself, but I'm actually surrounded by my GCSE group who are busy tapping away at computers writing up some market research. It's probably as close to solitude as it gets this term!

I feel a bit adrift really - there's just so much to do that I can't cope with doing things on time. Wedding, GOLD, and moving house have taken over all the spare time that I used to use for doing Guide admin and general cleaning up in the flat. If it weren't for the fact that Rob does a lot of the washing (in frustration at the mounds heaping up, I suspect) I'd have to resort to the "turn inside out and spray with deoderant" style of laundry. There's also a good debate warming up over potential projects for next year, but I haven't had time to get my thoughts in order to contribute yet. Hey ho.

Anyhow, my moments of peace are drawing to an end - three minutes until the bell goes - so I'd best be off.

My pupils' little tests* draw ever closer and life has turned into whirl of invigilating mock exams and marking practice papers. I'm drowning slowly under a mound of stripy paper covered in scrawly hurried writing, and I'm almost doing marking in my sleep. Luckily Rob's not yet woken covered in red-pen ticks, but I fear that day will come, and perhaps sooner than he realises!

In four weeks' time, the bulk of the panic will be over and the kids will either pass or fail without my help. There's a grim inevitability about it all, and I still get wound up wondering how they will do. I think I might do something a bit different this year to take my mind off the worries of exams. Perhaps a party. Maybe I should even buy a new outfit for it. I might even make a cake for it. What a great plan! I reckon there's a weekend free at the end of this month....

a.k.a. AS and A-levels